Blog Marco

Celebrities are mostly idiots. Celebrity news is written mostly of idiots. Celebrity news programs are mostly watched by idiots. This idiocy has a cycle. Without the celebrities, there would be no celebrity writers. Without the celebrity writers, there are no shows on celebrity news. Without the shows, that leaves no one to care. Without people caring (viewers), however, the show gets cancelled; the writers are out of a job and without the masses caring, that leaves no celebrity. All that leaves is an empty shell.

Therefore, in order to stay even slightly relevant (or not completely doomed to obscurity), Britney Spears has to neglect her kids, Amy Winehouse has to keep smoking crack and getting arrested, and Paris Hilton needs to have a new boyfriend every six weeks. When Mary Lou’s pension is disappearing, and her 401K is being swindled by Wall Street crooks and tycoons, what else is going to dull her pain? A crossword puzzle? Too cerebral. Let’s watch Lindsay Lohan drive into a group of small children, while drunk on Grey Goose and high on PCP!

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